Funny Friday: Debates Redux

Note: I wrote this post in November, but since added a few more items to this earlier post so that I could call it: New and Improved or is it New or Improved? Maybe it’s just regurgitated…

The Great (and not so great) Debates 

Everyone is entitled to their opinion (that’s my opinion), but does that mean we are free to give our unsolicited opinion whenever we want? You know, free speech and all…

I’m sure that I just opened a huge can of worms, methinks. So, just for fun, let’s crank the opener of these great dividers: Religion and Politi—Whoa! Hold it! Not those debates! This is “Funny Friday”don’t ya know?

Without further delay, let’s step up to the podiums, shall we?

Peanut Butter: Smoothy vs. Crunchy

Can you sit on the fence and say both? Of course you can! Will you? Probably not.

Crunchy hurts to eat, smoothy sticks to the roof of my mouth, crunchy rocks on toast but not on bagels, though. Smoothy: good for making fudge (unless you like crunchy fudge…)

What about natural? Woah, hold it right there, Bucko. This is not a ____vs.____vs.____

Kirk vs. Picard

No contest. You know I’m right…

Dogs vs. Cats

If you don’t care about loyalty or the return of affection and you want to be able to just leave for a few days without worrying…well, you know.

North Pole vs. South Pole

Santa, good. Penguins, cute! But what about the narwhals?

North pole: Pack ice South Pole: Packed ice

Coffee vs. Tea

I look forward to my morning coffee and my afternoon tea, but I have on rare occasions had a morning tea and I do enjoy an afternoon shot o’ espresso…

Ale vs. Lager

Beer lovers are either loyal or experimental. I see people beeline straight to their brand and get out of the store before I have even started to window shop. But that has nothing to do with the Ale vs. Lager debate does it…

PC vs. Mac

Endless updates and glitches, or should I just spend the damn $$$$?

Zoodles vs. Alphagetti

You know that they are pretty much the same thing, but what can you spell with Zoodles? (^{_{Psst. Hieroglyphs.}})

Two-ply vs. Three-ply

I didn’t include one-ply because it becomes two-ply since you know you’re going to fold it.

Coke vs. Pepsi

Both sweet. Both kinda caramelly. Both bubbly. Only one of them should be mixed with rum.

Classic Coke vs. New Coke

Remember that fiasco? Who wins? See previous.

The Turkey: Light meat vs. Dark meat

You might as well call this dry and bland vs. moist and tasty. Gravy is good for both

Star Trek vs. Star Wars

(See Kirk vs Picard)

McDonald’s vs Burger King

Isn’t the title “King” self explanatory, you clown?

Honorable Mentions:

Ren vs. Stimpy, Rick vs. Morty, Magellan vs. Cook, AM vs. FM, The Far Side vs. Non Sequitur

Well, I’m absolutely, positively, sure that I missed some real doozies, but like debating politics or religion, there’s no way that I’m touching those topics….that’s as volatile as discussing what pick-up truck is best.

 (It’s Chevy, BTW…)

-Leon

What are some of your funny dividers?

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, and a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words.

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, and a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words.